were you aware that dutch people are the tallest in the world? me neither.
their average height is 6 foot tall... and they seem to keep on growing. the government recently had to change building regulations to increase the height of doorways! mirrors in bathrooms were almost too high for me to look into. and i had to stand on my tippy-toes to see the keypad at the ATM. not kidding!
i unfortunately don't have a picture to match the absurd story i'm about to tell, so here's ^^ a pictures of me enjoying some tasty pipe tobacco on the balcony before the night began.
it was noelle's last night in amsterdam before her flight back to barcelona at 5 am. we spent the day exploring the narrow streets, and we kept telling ourselves this was our "last day alive"---a startling reminder to take full advantage of it.
that night, we went to a bar down the street from scarlett's for a weekly couchsurfing meet up. side note: the couchsurfing community is awe-inspiring. if you live in a large city, i recommend connecting with the community there immediately. it's borderline unfair how easy it is to meet interesting, well-traveled people from around the world. life long friends can be made!
on my way back to noelle after ordering another drink at the bar, i turned a corner and bumped into maybe one of the tallest guys i've ever seen. i tilted my head all the way back to look up at him and apologize, but instead inadvertently said, "wow! you're taaalllll." he laughed and we started talking.
he told me he was over 2 meters tall. i had no idea what that meant, but i nodded and believed it... then two of his fellow dutch guy friends came and introduced themselves. they modestly admitted to standing about 2 meters tall, too! when i wasn't so shy anymore, i asked if they could convert their heights to america's silly system of measurement for me. and so there i was at a corner pub in amsterdam, standing with guys who were 6'5, 6'6, and 6'8.
when it hit 1 am, noelle had to go home to get things sorted for her flight. i initially intended on going back with her, but these friendly new dutch giants invited me to come with them to another bar. i thought, it's the last day of my life! why not!
so i rode on the back of one of their bikes (a very common, very adorable dutch thing to do), along the dimly lit streets and canals to a traditional nightclub in westerpark. we went in and they led me toward the middle of the dance floor, where i stopped, looked up, and just laughed.
i felt like i'd been transported to an all tall-person planet. everyone around me (girls included) was so tall that i felt like a child... or maybe a hobbit. i kept getting bumped into and nudged around because, i'm assuming, nobody could really see me! the boys were such gentleman though, and did their best to guard me against their fellow tall folk.
when that got a little overwhelming, we all went outside to get some fresh air and smoke (hah!). i met two more of their friends, who were just as damn tall as the rest of them. so there i was standing in the middle of a circle of five guys ranging from 6'5-6'8, feeling soooo miniscule.
it kind of felt like standing in a forest, and i was talking to the tree tops. i jokingly jumped as high as i could every time i had to say something to one of them, to get my words a bit higher. my neck started hurting from having to tilt my head so far back. and they had to crouch down, nearly folding in half just to hear me. there miiiight've even been a two second delay from my lips to their ears...
then, out of nowhere, one of the boys picked me up and held me high in his arms like a newlywed bride... he said very frankly, "there. now you're as tall as we are! we can talk face to face." and he just held me like that, suspended at his eye level, and continued on with the conversation!
after a few minutes of that, he passed me on to the next tall friend in the circle, who held me the same way for a few minutes and continued on with conversation... and then to the next boy. again. and again. until i'd been passed around this circle of dutch giants like some sort of drunken toddler that they didn't want roaming about at ground level alone...
i don't know?! all i know is that i giggled the entire time this was happening out of sheer disbe-fucking-lief at all of the wonderfully ridiculous stories i've been accumulating lately. thanks universe, keep em comin!
naturally, i told amber this story as soon as possible, since she's forever in search of a man taller than her who isn't a complete dweeb. she about laughed her head clean off her shoulders. and then swore she'd come to holland soon, to find herself a boy who makes her feel short.
because we all deserve to feel really small sometimes :)